P90X Round 2 Day 8: Chest and Back & Ab Ripper X

So, I have no idea what the hell happened to me in just one week, but I somehow was able to CRUSH standard push-ups today. I cranked out 60 without stopping, which is 10 reps higher than what I started round 2 with last week. Was that rest day I took a day of magic, or did I become a superhero over the weekend? I think that my added strength had to do with going deeper on my push-ups last week possibly. I was able to touch my chest against the ground before coming up on push-ups last week with no problems, so I guess that must of tremendously added some chest strength? Either that or the Eminem I had blasting in the background got me pumped. Haha, I am at a loss of words really, but I am not complaining. Anyway, since I was able to do 60 in great form without stopping today, I'm going to set a high goal of increasing my push-up rep count by 10 weekly. Yeah yeah, the ego is really big today. I know. Is this rep increase possible? Who knows? But I'm going to find out. If I can get to 100 push-ups without stopping at ANY point during this round, I'll be EXTREMELY happy.

The pull-ups increased a ridiculous amount from last week too. I went from 13 wide grip front pull-ups to a total of 18 to start. I still used 25 pounds of weight added on my dip belt. All of this number crushing did have me a little worn down near the end of the video though, which I figured would happen. However, I was so excited that I didn't stop going, of course. It's like the tank was on empty, but I wanted to see how far I could push the pin past that empty mark. Why not? It doesn't make sense to beat a number by one and then quit if I feel like I can crank some more reps out. I may experiment with some more added weight on the pull-ups next week, but we'll see with that.

I was able to nail Ab Ripper X again with the rep count, and today I did something extra. I threw my arms in the air for the In and Outs, Bicycles and Reverse Bicycle moves today. I started thinking to myself that this would be a great way to increase lower back strength, because it has to maintain more balance. Then, I can start cranking out those Crunchy Frogs with no problem. At least, that's my hypothesis for the time being. Plus, adding arms in the air makes those first three moves pretty tough.

Also, on a side note, despite getting maybe only 4-5 hours of sleep from last night, I had no issues at work today with fatigue. The day actually seemed to go by quicker somehow! The stranger thing that has me baffled is how I wasn't affected from the lack of sleep during the workout. Tonight I plan on getting a well deserved 7 hours of sleep, and I think I'm going to sub out Plyometrics with a lighter custom cardio workout for tomorrow. Maybe all that high intensity interval training from last week limited some muscle growth by burning a little of it off. This week is slowly becoming an experimental week it looks like.

The diet was clean yet again today. Here's how it went:

Meal 1:
- 2 whole eggs, 3 egg whites
- cup of oatmeal
- banana
- glass of soy milk

Meal 2:
- 2 tbsp olive oil
- carrots
- granny smith apple

Meal 3:
- protein bar
- protein shake

Meal 4:
- turkey wrap (whole wheat wrap)
- whole grain brown rice (cup)
- 1 0z dry roasted peanuts

Meal 5:
- multi-grain crackers
- orange
- chicken breast
- peanut butter sandwich on whole wheat

Meal 6:
- recovery drink
- protein bar

Meal 7:
- chicken breast
- glass of V8 low sodium
- celery sticks

Meal 8:
- two scoops of casein protein before bed

Thanks for reading,
K-Dawg

P90X Round 2 Day 7: Rest

Day 07
Today was a rest day or a day off from training, and boy, did I rest. I slept in until about noon today (I know, what a champ, right?) to where I instantly checked my fantasy hockey team, only to see it sitting there in shambles. I have Sidney Crosby on my team, so you can probably guess that my team has been struggling to make the fantasy playoffs as he has been injured for the last month or so. But that's a whole another ball-game and you simply wouldn't want to hear my rants about fantasy hockey. Besides, there would probably be a lot swear words on here and I have to keep my reputation as a gentleman, ya know!

After viewing the ruins of my fantasy hockey team, I decided to check the weight today to see if I am making any gains. In order to keep things accurate, I will be checking my weight every Sunday morning on an empty stomach before breakfast. This way no water weight is factored in here. When I checked the scale, I was a little surprised and disappointed to see 155.6 (I use a digital scale). Now, I did gain some weight although it was only about half a pound. That's not terrible, but at this rate, I would only weigh about 163 at the end of my 13 weeks. I'm trying to shoot for a slow gain in muscle to 170, so I decided that I would add to my daily calorie intake. I knew my metabolism was always pretty fast, but this is straight up ridiculous. I am having trouble gaining weight even when eating 3750 calories daily! Therefore, I will now be eating at least 4000 calories daily. Those added calories will give me at least an extra 1000 every week compared to when I was eating roughly 3750. This sounds like fun for most of you, but it's actually pretty hard to eat 4000 healthy calories daily. I have to split them up in about 7-9 meals throughout the day about 2-3 hours apart from each meal.

After I checked my weight, I pretty much relaxed at the house all day. I made meals for work tomorrow and here's a sample of what I take to work with me everyday to eat:
As you can see, I don't fool around. The things up above that I am taking to work with me tomorrow include some brown rice, cottage cheese, turkey with a wrap, peanut butter sandwich, protein bar, protein shake, whole grain crackers, apple, orange, 3 oz of carrots, 2 tbsp of olive oil, 1 oz dry roasted peanuts and grilled chicken breast. I'll split these up into four meals at work tomorrow.

The meals went pretty well again I believe today. Here's how it went:
Meal 1:
- 2 whole eggs, 3 egg whites
- cup of oatmeal
- cup of strawberries
- glass of almond milk

Meal 2:
- protein bar
- banana

Meal 3:
- chicken breast
- cup of whole wheat pasta
- cottage cheese with apples and a hint of cinnamon
- multi-grain crackers

Meal 4:
- peanut butter sandwich (whole wheat bread)
- 1 oz dry roasted peanuts
- honey nut cherrios (cup)
- kiwi

Meal 5:
- protein bar
- protein shake

Meal 6:
- two scoops of unflavored whey with water (the absolute worst thing I have ever tasted in my life. Hands down. It's so bad that I have to hold my breath and down it really quick in order to finish it. It's so healthy though. No fat, 50 some grams of protein, 210 calories, 2 carbs and no sugar)
- tofu salad
- baby carrots

Meal 7 (before bed):
- one scoop of casein protein
- 2 tbsp of olive oil

It looks like I'll be going to bed a little late tonight, so hopefully I won't have any issues working at The Office tomorrow (and no that was not a Steve Carrel reference). I find that whenever I get under 7 hours of sleep I sometimes have to catch myself from falling into a hypnotic sleep. When that happens, I'll try to eat something with carbs for a brief energy boost. Coffee is always a last resort.

Thanks for reading,
K-Dawg

P90X Round 2 Day 6: Kenpo X

Day 06
One of the most enjoyable workouts of P90X, Kenpo X is a balanced karate and martial arts workout. It's also considered a cardio workout, so sweat is known to drip everywhere. I personally think this is the best cardio workout in P90X by far. You don't feel like dying like how you do in Plyometrics because jabs, kicks and blocks are pretty enjoyable. I mean, who doesn't like to throw a couple of jabs here and there? Ya know, I guess I love to cause trouble. But seriously though, the great thing I like about Kenpo is that it is unique and well-balanced at the same time. It's pretty cool because you learn a bunch of karate moves you can use whenever you need to in self defense. Also, this workout really engages every muscle group in your body. I've noticed that the shoulders are consistently involved in every move. Throwing jabs, uppercuts and even performing blocks involves quick motion of the shoulder. Crazy as it sounds, the shoulder is even involved in all the kick sequences with the right form. This is because you should always have you're elbows up so you don't leave yourself vulnerable to attack. It's pretty simple really. Ever see a boxer or martial arts fighter lower his elbows down in a fight? I saw a boxing video where a guy briefly lowered his elbows, and he got DECKED in the face and fell flat to the ground unconscious. You could literally hear the power from the punch too, it was nasty. To give you an idea of how loud the punch was, it sounded as loud as the milk cartons troublemakers use to pop in your high school lunchroom (and no, I was not one of those troublemakers!). So in conclusion, don't be like that guy and NEVER lower your guard. My guess is that he was pretty tired and gassed from boxing multiple rounds so he decided to drop for a quick breather. In the end though, it was a bad decision.

I woke up and had a breakfast of champions before taking my gram to the grocery store. I also had to do a lot of shopping for food. I drove to the deli nearby my house and absolutely stocked up on veggies and fruits and ended up only shelling out under $16. I got a lot of stuff there too. I picked up several bananas, a four lb bag of oranges, about eight apples, cucumbers, lettuce, kiwi, baby carrots, etc. Then, I went to Walmart right after and ended up paying $85 in groceries on small things like eggs (I get 5 dozen), soy milk, bread and wraps, yogurt and fish. That was a pretty big hit, but I've done worse with spending money for nutritious food honestly. If I bought a few packs of protein bars, I would of been easily over $120 today. Luckily, I have about eight or nine boxes of different types of protein bars at my house.

After I finished shopping, I relaxed briefly at home and decided to give Kenpo X a run then. As always, Kenpo X was a good sweat for me today. However, today I thought that I would be nuts and do the starting sequence (jabs, hooks and uppercuts) while holding 5 lb dumbbells in each hand. Now, it may not sound like a lot of weight, but I felt like I was holding the weight of the world in my hands after all those quick jabs. I can say that you immediately notice a difference in the shoulders as they really burn when cranking out variations of 25-30 punches leading with each side on your body. This was the first time I ever tried adding weight to Kenpo X and I will definitely be doing it again in the future for this workout. I didn't use any weight for the kick or block sequence because there is more movement involved in those exercises and I didn't want to tweak anything with a 5 lb weight. Imagine how embarrassing that would be! "Yeah, I tore my rotator cuff from swinging a 5 lb dumbbell". Not the best way to pick up chicks. I also used the weights on the vertical punches at the end, and that is killer on the shoulders once you hit over 75 of them and climb into the 100 rep mark. Anyhow, I had fun with this workout like always.

Most powerful attack in Kenpo X:
Knee Kicks. These in my opinion are easily the most powerful move in the whole workout. You can really do some damage by kicking your knees up. Martial artists have been known to break other people's noses and win fights with this move. Don't try this one on your buddy, for sure!

Quickest combo attack in Kenpo X:
Jab / Cross. Give him the left, right, thanks for coming!

Best move for multiple opponents in Kenpo X:
Knuckles / Ball Kick / Back Kick Combo. You do a punch where you open your chest by punching your knuckles out (could take out two opponents on each side), a kick in the air up high in the front and a kick in the back for up to a total of four opponents.

After Kenpo I continued to eat clean and saw Unknown at the movies with Chris. Unknown was a decent thriller to watch, by the way. It won't blow you away though either, despite all of the twists they want to throw at you. Here's how the diet broke down for today:

Meal 1:
- 2 whole eggs, 3 egg whites
- cup of oatmeal
- banana
- glass of soy milk

Meal 2:
- protein bar
- recovery drink

Meal 3:
- cottage cheese and apple slices
- turkey whole wheat wrap
- brown whole rice

Meal 4:
- peanut butter sandwich (whole wheat bread)
- 1 oz dry roasted peanuts
- honey nut cherrios (cup)
- orange

Meal 5:
- protein bar
- protein shake

Meal 6:
- grilled chicken breast
- tofu salad
- baby carrots
- 2 tbsps of olive oil

Meal 7:
- one scoop of casein protein before bed

Thanks for reading,
K-Dawg

P90X Round 2 Day 5: Legs and Back & Ab Ripper X

There is no other workout in P90X that makes me sweat more than Legs and Back. Plyometrics does not even surpass the amount of sweat that comes from doing Legs and Back. Still, I absolutely LOVE Legs and Back and it is my second favorite workout for P90X. The sweat rolls off of me like I am melting everytime I do this one. The main reason I love this workout is because there's a lot of variation involved with the legs and backs. You do four different types of pull-ups twice in this workout. There are reverse grip, wide forward grip, closed overhand grip and switch grips. In my personal opinion, the wide forward grips are the most difficult variation. Switch grips seems to be the easiest as I always crank out the best numbers on that variation.

I decided to up the ante a little bit today when doing my workout. As I was driving home from work today I was thinking about how I could become more "extreme" for today's workout. Of course, I always could pop a couple of steroids before my workout and get busy, but I want to be practical and ethical. Plus, that would be cheating and not fair. That's why I decided that I would add some form of weight on every exercise today. I added the usual 25 lb weight to the dip belt for doing pull-ups today, and I upped most of the leg workouts to 30 pounds. On the exercises where Tony doesn't use weight at all, I added 5 pound dumbbells to those workouts because they are generally very long, and I don't think I could last for 25 deadlift squats with 30 pound dumbbells. I got a pretty nice sweat going today, and like Shoulders and Arms earlier this week, this Legs and Back workout was probably in the top three workouts I ever had. I really was able to bring extra intensity during today's workout and I especially felt a crazy burn after doing the calf raises today. Like always, the pull-ups were challenging with added weight, but I was able to actually log some pretty nice reps with good form today.

Ab Ripper X is always pretty tough but I am still able to pull through all of the reps barely. I think that perhaps a reason I have been struggling on the Crunchy Frog move is because of how much my quads and legs are engaged up to that point. The previous three moves are In and Outs, Bicycles and Reverse Bicylces. All of those previous three moves use the quads pretty extensively actually. Once the Crunchy Frog comes on, I discovered that my legs are usually toast. That's what makes balance pretty difficult I feel. Therefore, I feel that once I build more muscle in my legs, I'll be able to crank those crunchy frogs out no problem.

I think working the legs out is extremely important, but I feel that a lot of gym junkies overlook them. Not that I really care what someone else does at the gym, but I'll tell an interesting story at how overlooked legs really are. A few weeks ago, I decided to sub a deadlift and squat day in for plyometrics. I really wanted a day of putting a lot of tension on my leg muscles, so I went down to gym to workout after work. By the time I arrived, it was after 6PM. This is usually prime hours for the gym I workout at, so I was not shocked to see that it was PACKED when I walked in the door. There were at least 20 people in the room I was in. Naturally, I expected that it would take forever to be able to actually do squats in the power-rack, because they only have two available at the gym. After I finished warming up and strecthing, to my surprise there was no one even near the power-rack for squats. I walked right up, loaded my weight on the bar and cranked out ALL of my squat sets without anyone even approaching me to use the power-rack. Meanwhile, every dumbbell was virtually unavailable, and forget about even trying to use an incline bench or even a flat one, as everyone was so set on working their upper body and abs. After I finished my squats, I did some deadlifts, calf and hammy moves for about fourty five minutes and I counted maybe two people after me who used the power-rack. To top it off, one guy was using it for bicep curls. Like I wrote before, I'm not personally upset about this (especially since I had no trouble using equipment), but it seems like the society we live in today is so set on building the perfect upper body and core, but yet fail to recoginze the importance of balancing everything with a strong lower body. Do people actually want a huge upper body with peg legs? Just my two cents.

The diet went clean for the 5th day in a row this week. I decided to take a little more food in today because I truly believe that I burn the most calories on this workout compared to any other. I ate close to 3900 calories today.

Here's how it went:
- 2 whole eggs, 3 egg whites
- cup of oatmeal
- orange
- glass of soy milk

Meal 2:
- tbsp olive oil
- carrots

Meal 3:
- protein bar
- protein shake

Meal 4:
- whole wheat pasta (cup)
- whole grain brown rice (cup)
- banana
- 1 0z dry roasted peanuts

Meal 5:
- solid white albacore tuna on whole wheat wrap
- yogurt (non-fat fruit flavored)
- honey nut cherrios (cup)
- granny smith apple

Meal 6:
- recovery drink
- protein bar

Meal 7:
- grilled chicken breast
- glass of V8 low sodium
- tbsp olive oil

Meal 8:
- two scoops of casein protein before bed

P90X Round 2 Day 4: Yoga X

Day 04
Today's workout was Yoga X, which is an hour and thirty minutes long of different stretches and balance postures that are meant to increase flexibility. During my first round, when I looked at what was in store for me on the schedule for day four, I laughed when I saw Yoga X sitting there. I thought to myself that it was going to be like a recovery day. I was way off. Not only did I work harder than expected during Yoga X, I was left cursing in my room for an hour and thirty minutes. I hated Yoga after the first time I did it.

The main reason I hated Yoga X was because my flexibility was terrible. I was as flexible as a cinder-block before I started doing Yoga. Seriously, I would have probably tweaked every muscle in my body if I played Twister. I actually felt angry when doing Yoga X the first couple of times and I thought to myself, "Wait, I'm suppose to feel calm during Yoga, not the opposite". Yeah, it was pretty rough during the first few weeks, but I was also impatient.

During the fourth week or the first recovery week during round one, I noticed that my flexibility vastly improved and I actually grew a like for it. Now, I like when I see that I have to do Yoga X. It's enjoyable. The key to getting past Yoga is that you have to hammer out the first 45 minutes. They are the toughest minutes in the workout, no doubt. It is a bunch of warrior moves and there is plenty body-twisting and turning involved. The standing splits are killer on my legs as well. I think once you get past the first 45 minutes, it's all downhill from there. The balance postures are pretty fun such as tree and royal dancer. The Yoga Belly 7 is a great mini ab workout that is pretty enjoyable too, despite the intensity you have to bring for that.

While doing Yoga today, I decided to put some music on over Tony again. I put something soothing and calm on, that would give a good mood to doing Yoga. So, I grabbed my handy iPod and played some Sigur Rios. The "( )" album is very soothing and mellow, and therefore, a great option for Yoga. I really felt calm and care-free for majority of the workout because of the album. It seemed like the first 45 minutes flew by, and then it was all downhill from there. Crane is a pretty tough move and I am only able to hold it for a handful of seconds, and then I have to come out of it. I'm going to have to research how to tackle that move better. Yoga Belly 7 went fine today, and I was able to do all seven moves without stopping to catch my breath. Then I finished with the corpse and the om's at the end. Many people complain about doing the last five minutes and skip it, but I actually enjoy it so I do it everytime.

On a side note from the workout, I got into a conversation with my mentor at work today about working out and healthy nutrition and trying to implement it as a life-style for the rest of my life. Everyone at work seems to know I live a healthy life-style currently because they always see me eating healthy food often in the break room. I usually take at least three or four meals with me to work everyday. Talk about carrying a heavy lunch bag! Anyway, I got into this conversation with my mentor and he seemed to have the opinion that living this lifestyle for the rest of my life is impossible and wouldn't bring me much happiness even if I were able to achieve it. It made me ponder about it a little and when I asked "Why?", he brought up a point that although I enjoy it, I won't be able to convert my future wife or girlfriend to live that type of lifestyle. I also think there was a reason that I would get sick of eating the same types of food everyday. Now these are some valid points but here is how I think it goes:

1. My goal is not to convert people to live the same type of life-style I live. My primary concern is my health. When you grab weights and start pumping away, you are the only one who gets the results. I can't give any muscle gains I make to someone else. Therefore, I could really care less what people do or what they think when it comes to that kind of thing. But at the same time, I'll gladly help anyone out who wants help with eating more nutritously or working out.

2. I don't think I could live this type of life-style for the rest of my life. I know it. I currently enjoy it more than when I was eating less healthy. Why stop doing something that makes you happy? Simple as that.

3. A good little trick to make sure you don't get sick of eating the same types of food I discovered is to switch up your diet everynow and then. Don't just set a slate menu for yourself everyday during every week with the same meals over and over again. Add a little variety. That's the key to continuing something: switch it up and make it interesting. For example, although I eat the same types of foods everyday, I will make subtle little switches here and there that actually make eating enjoyable. Maybe I have a protein bar and protein shake everyday at 10AM, but that doesn't mean I have to eat the same exact bar everyday. I'll throw a little switch with flavors or maybe I'll try some bar I never tried before every now and then. How boring would it be to have the same protein shake everyday with the same bar? Therefore, my hypothesis is that set meals in stone are a bad idea to continuing a healthy lifestyle. Add some flexibility to your diet and you won't feel shackled to it.

4. Not only do I get enjoyment out of working out and eating healthy, I get benefits in terms of:
- feeling good
- living longer
- looking good

Another thing I have heard from people is the statement that you should enjoy your life and that following a healthy diet is not worth the hassle for just a couple of extra years. This one always sets me off. Oh really? So you're saying I should enjoy my life without worrying about health problems from a poor diet? My thought process is this: If I can live to be over 80 and still have solid health from eating a good diet, wouldn't I have more opportunity to enjoy my life more than the guy who clogged his arteries and died at the age of 40? He would have only lived just 1/2 of the life I lived. Hello people! Just look at Jack Lalanne. He was able to achieve a great life and lived to be 96 years old. He pulled a bunch of boats in the ocean while being shackled up at the age of 70!


There you have it. I got all philosophical (and probably put you to sleep) to back up my reasons of why achieving this type of life-style for the duration of a life is not difficult or complicated at all. Speaking of which, the diet was pretty clean again today. Here's how it went:

Meal 1:
- 2 whole eggs, 3 egg whites
- cup of oatmeal
- granny smith apple
- glass of soy milk

Meal 2:
- tbsp olive oil
- carrots

Meal 3:
- protein bar
- protein shake

Meal 4:
- whole wheat pasta (cup)
- whole grain brown rice
- banana
- 1 0z dry roasted peanuts

Meal 5:
- turkey on whole wheat wrap
- rice cakes with peanut butter spread
- orange

Meal 6:
- recovery drink
- protein bar

Meal 7:
- grilled chicken breast
- glass of V8 low sodium
- tbsp olive oil
- natural whey protein powder and water
- yogurt (non-fat fruit flavored)

Meal 8:
- scoop of casein protein before bed

Thanks for reading,
K-Dawg

P90X Round 2 Day 3: Shoulders and Arms & Ab Ripper X

Day 03
Today was probably the deepest I have ever went on a P90X workout. I felt awesome after Shoulders and Arms with Ab Ripper today. There were a couple of reasons for this I feel. First off, I worked today like every weekday from 8:00-4:30. I literally drove about 80 mph on the highway to hurry back home and do my workout before going out for my Gram's 80th birthday at 6:30. Therefore, I took no pauses at all today as I didn't want to waste time. I didn't even hit the pause button to change weights. I changed weights briefly while Tony was talking in between sets. Another thing for today's workout: I knew I would need some extra energy so I threw some music on over Tony's voice. I practically have everything he says memorized now anyway after doing Shoulders and Arms so many times during my first round of P90X. The music of choice for today was Coldplay. I really can get pumped with that! Just kidding, I threw on a nice metal and rock mix. Coldplay would probably put me right to sleep.

This workout involves a move with the shoulders followed by an exercise that engages the biceps and then another exercise involing the triceps. Then you repeat that throughout the whole workout for about 50 minutes or so. It's a pretty solid workout and is up there with some of my favorite videos for P90X.

I really like the Bicep exercises in this video. The Congdon curls are straight cash, homie! I used 35 pounds on a lot of exercises today. I tried to really put a lot of tension on them. I also was impressed when I got down on my chair and cranked out 51 chair dips non-stop. The strength in my triceps has gone through the roof it appears. Pretty soon I figure I'll start pulling cars with a chain at this rate.

Ab Ripper X was tough and exhausting as always, but I was able to dig down and crank out all the reps. I don't know why I really struggle with that Crunchy Frog move though. A lot of other people seem to think that is the easiest one in Ab Ripper X. Perhaps I need to strengthen my lower back move, because it seems to be engaged a bit on that move. It could be a balance related issue too I suppose, but I really struggle through this one everytime.

"You want that pizza, don't you fatboy? Go ahead take a slice..." - White Goodman

The diet was pretty clean again today, but I avoided a potential disaster. As I wrote earlier, my family and I went out today to celebrate my gram's 80th birthday. We decided to go to Ruby's Pizza, which is pretty much a dive bar about 5 minutes from where I live. But my god, their pizza there is phe·nom·e·nal.
Naturally, my family decided to order three pies of pizza, and I was asked to have "just a slice" many, many times. "Oh look. There's just a few slices left. Have a few, Kurt." Now, I personally am not even a big pizza fan, but their pizza is delicious there. Don't worry, I did not cave to this pressure. I took the easy way out by stuffing myself with a protein bar and recovery drink after finishing my workout which was right before we left to eat. I wasn't even hungry for a slice of pizza, so I had no problems refusing one. Even if I was craving some pizza I wouldn't of had one. I strongly feel like today's workout is in at least the top three best performances I had, if not the best. There's no way that I was throwing even a hint of progress out the window for five minutes in pizza heaven. So, I swerved a good pothole in the diet road tonight I think.

Here's how the diet looked today:
Meal 1:
- 2 whole eggs, 3 egg whites
- cup of oatmeal
- orange
- glass of soy milk

Meal 2:
- tbsp olive oil
- carrots

Meal 3:
- protein bar
- protein shake

Meal 4:
- whole wheat pasta (cup)
- solid white albacore tuna w/ light mayo
- banana
- 1 0z dry roasted peanuts

Meal 5:
- chicken on whole wheat wrap
- peanut butter and celery sticks
- honey nut cherrios
- granny smith apple

Meal 6:
- recovery drink
- protein bar

Meal 7:
- chicken salad w balsamic vingear as dressing

Meal 8:
- 2 scoops of casein protein before bed

Cheers!
K-Dawg

P90X Round 2 Day 2: Plyometrics

Day 02
Plyometrics is also referred to as jump training and is also known as the "mother" of all P90X workouts. I also like to think of it as the beast of all P90X workouts. It's basically an hour of doing lunges, jumps, squats and quick lateral movements. As difficult as this workout sounds, I like it. The idea behind this workout is pretty straight-forward: get the heart pumping and build leg strength.

Today, I came home from work and decided to give Plyometrics a go shortly after checking my fantasy hockey lineup, of course. ;-) I can do this workout now all the way through without stopping no problem (other than a rapid heart beat and the feeling that my heart is going to implode out of my chest). However, I really want to be careful of how intense I want my cardio to get. This is a long cardio workout, so if I go too hard, I know that I'll be burning muscle. So, I did a lot of the modified moves and tried to keep my heart level down low. When you do lighter cardio, your body burns fat more easily. If you do intense cardio, you'll burn fat, but you can also burn any gains of muscle you may have. You're body burns different fuels when you have different heart rates. That's why I was careful with the workout today. After all, I want to gain weight, not lose it. I think I'm actually going to sub this workout out for a 20 minute jog or bike ride from time to time, but I still plan on doing Plyo at least once every month.

There are a lot of tough moves with Plyometrics, my least personal favorite is the Rock Star hops. This move is pretty intense and you basically stand up like you're getting ready to strum a guitar. Then in one swift motion just like Angus Young, you jump your heels to your butt and do a windmill like guitar strum motion with one arm. The other arm is facing out like you were holding a guitar in that arm. Then you switch arms and directions to balance things out. It's funny because I noticed that during this move I always get my second wind. It's like I'm out playing guitar in Madison Square Garden and the crowd and cheering has me pumping on adrenaline. Another rough move is the Mary Katherine Lunges. Let's not even go there, they make your quads feel like a boss.

On the flip side, the circle runs are pretty neat. You basically run around a towel in both clockwise and counter-clockwise directions. During this move in particular, I can feel my agility improving off the charts. Step aside, Adrian Peterson! There's a new kid in town. Hahaha yeah right. That dude is jacked and I'm pretty sure he could run circles around me all day if he wanted to.

The diet was pretty clean today again although I did eat a little more calories than usual because this workout probably burns the most calories compared to any other exercise in P90X.

Here's how it looked:

Meal 1:
-Two whole eggs, Three egg whites
-Glass of almond milk
-Cup of oatmeal

Meal 2:
-Carrots
-Tbsp Olive oil

Meal 3:
-Protein bar
-Protein shake

Meal 4:
-Cup of whole wheat pasta
-Solid White albacore tuna w/ Light Mayo
-Granny Smith Apple
-1 oz dry roasted peanuts

Meal 5:
-12 Crackers
-Chicken Breast on Whole Wheat Wrap
-Peanut butter sandwich on whole wheat
-Orange

Meal 6:
-Protein bar
-Recovery drink

Meal 7:
-Dried fruit (apples)
-Chicken Strips on Whole Wheat Wrap and Mustard
-Yogurt (non-fat blueberry)
-Glass of Low sodium V8
-Grilled Chicken Breast

Meal 8:
-2 scoops of casein protein

A few people have been asking me about different products I have tried so I think I will start a review section on them in the near future. Stay tuned and as always....

Thanks for reading,
K-Dawg

P90X Round 2 Day 1: Chest and Back & Ab Ripper X

"The highest compliment that you can pay me is to say that I work hard every day, that I never dog it."

- Wayne Gretzky

Introduction and Background:
After finishing my first round of P90X, I knew things were not finished for me. I wasn't just going to quit now. I wanted to keep going on. I decided to do a second round of P90X and track my progress on my blog here. I feel this will keep me motivated and mildly entertain some other folks at the same time. I was able to create some pretty good results after my first round and I plan to do the same for my second time around. However, I will do my best to mix things up so I don't get use to the same routines.

Goals
Now, a lot of people get on what I call little "surges" of working out. Basically, working out is a short term thing for most people. For example, someone maybe works up because he wants to impress ladies at the beach with a 6 pack (not saying that there's anything wrong with that). Other people just want to shred their gut off and some just want to increase endurance and stamina. These are nice things and all, but I say why not have long term goals (and I realize that there are some people who have long term lifting goals). Why not work harder? Why not challenge yourself? Why not incorporate this into a lifestyle? Therefore, my goals are rather simple when you sum everything up. I want to improve my lifestyle.

I want to add years to my life. I want to enjoy the rest of my life. I want to look back and smile when I'm older and think of all the crazy things I did in the past to improve myself. I want to have good stories of hard work to tell. That's what I want from this. So no, I'm not going to quit working out after I finish this round of p90X. And no, I am not going to quit eating healthy. I enjoy everything I do right now. Why would I stop? Enough preaching I suppose. Now let's get down to business.

Long term goals:
- Improve lifestyle
- Add years to my life
- Eat nutritious

Short term goals:
- Look like Brad Pitt from Fight Club (just kidding, relax)
- Gain roughly 15 pounds of muscle to a solid 170 pounds
- Improve leg strength
- Improve chest strength
- Provide entertainment for myself and others with this blog

The Tale of the Tape:
Height: 5' 10"
Current weight: 155 lbs
Goal weight: 170 lbs
Current age: 22
Hometown: Wilkes Barre, PA
Max Wide Pull-ups without stopping (no weight): 24
Max Push-ups without stopping (no weight): 44

Pictures (Front and Back view):




Day 01
Ah, day numero uno. Day one of round two made me feel just like the first day I did round one of P90X. I was sprawled out on my floor gasping for air at times. Chest and Back is a rather difficult, but enjoyable workout that involves extreme mechanics of pushing and pulling. There are plenty of chin ups, and a nice variety of them in my opinion. There are three types to be exact (Wide Grip, Close Overhand, Reverse Grip). There are also a great variety of push-ups involved here.

The workout starts out with standard push-ups and I was able to crank out 50 without stopping. I was rather impressed that I hit 50 and am clueless how this happened because I was only able to do in the low 40's near the end of the first round. It's possible that a little bit of rest may have helped. After the standard push-ups you jump into Wide Grip Pull-ups. I was able to crank out 13 with 25 pounds of weight added. I use a dip belt and just put the weight on that while doing the pull-ups. Let me tell you this, it is a lot more difficult doing pull-ups with weight! I feel like there is lead in my shoes when doing these, but I think it will help to gain muscle weight. The workout continues and I was able to dig down pretty good.

Ab Ripper X is probably one of the toughest ab routines ever created. I know that a lot of professional and amateur bodybuilders prefer to do this for their ab workouts. It's a very nice rounded routine that has 11 difficult moves with 25 reps for each move to it. At this point, I am able to do all of the reps, but there were a few today that I had to catch my breath briefly. I particularly do not like the Crunchy Frog workout. Some people actually find this one to be easy, but I always seem wasted by the point of this one. Anyway, I took a brief stop and caught up to the video eventually. No problems with Ab Ripper X.

My diet is really clean but I eat A LOT. I found that if I follow the portion plan from P90X, I actually lose a good amount of weight weekly. One time during round one, I stepped on the scale and noticed a 5 lb loss of weight in one week! Losing weight is not my goal. Therefore, I follow the same percentages of everything as the portion plan, but just increase my calories. I have anywhere from 3750-4000 calories a day. I also like to hit at least 225 grams of protein a day along with at least 100 grams of fat so I don't end up burning muscle. My diet is pretty carb heavy as well at this moment (roughly hitting 400+ grams of carbs a day). I eat a lot, but I don't eat any junk. Here is how my diet went today.

Meal 1:
-Two whole eggs, Three egg whites
-Glass of almond milk
-Cup of oatmeal
-Kiwi

Meal 2:
-Carrots
-Tbsp Olive oil

Meal 3:
-Protein bar
-Protein shake

Meal 4:
-Cup of whole wheat pasta
-Solid White albacore tuna w/ Light Mayo
-Granny Smith Apple
-Cup of Honey nut cherrios

Meal 5:
-12 Crackers
-1 oz dry roasted peanuts
-Peanut butter sandwich on whole wheat
-Orange

Meal 6:
-Protein bar
-Recovery drink

Meal 7:
-Cup of cucumbers
-Glass of Low Sodium V8
-2 scoops of casein protein

As you can see, I eat a lot and I spread all those meals throughout the day. I eat roughly every 2-3 hours to speed the metabolism up. My main goal is to follow this nutrition and SLOWLY gain a pound of muscle a week to minimize fat gaining. I know the abs may get less noticeable, but I eventually plan on doing a cut after gaining all of this muscle. Anyway, sorry for the long post, but this is the first day of round two.

Thanks for reading,
K-Dawg

The Book of Lost Tales: Chapter 9 - Rest Well, my Child

During the two weeks I took off after Insanity, I got plenty of rest and I remember that I didn't work as much. I basically slept all day and when I woke up, I would watch several movies all night and then repeat the next day. Honestly, I welcomed the rest at first, but it soon became very boring. Watching movies all day and then occasionally working a four hour shift here and there was not difficult at all. I was looking for a challenge, and I was kind of shocked that I missed working out so intensely. But I wanted more. I wanted to change my whole lifestyle. This wasn't about just shredding some fat and getting a six pack anymore. It was living a healthy lifestyle for good. That was my new priority. I wasn't ready to just throw the towel in on healthy living.

The first week of my rest period, I researched the internet like a scout trying to decide what I would put on my plate next. I briefly considered another round of Insanity, but I wanted to start gaining more muscle. I also considered the extreme of gaining muscle and try something ridiculous like Arnold's Pumping Iron workout. However, I don't have that much equipment at the house and that would just be ridiculously insane. I considered trying a hybrid program of intense sports training for a month or two as well. There were really a lot of options to choose from, and I kept an open mind to everything. I still wasn't exactly sure what was in store for me after my rest period but I knew I wanted something challenging.

I still followed my diet pretty well during the rest week. I logged all of my calories and was taking about 2250 or so a day during my rest week. The important thing to keep in mind is not to indulge after finishing an intense workout program. I have read a lot of stories about people who put on about 70% of all the weight they lost from Insanity after a two week period of finishing it. You need to be careful and continue to eat healthy. I knew that just because I finished an intense cardio workout program that I wasn't going to "treat myself" because I deserved it or something. In reality, I probably did deserve an off-diet day, but I wasn't going to partake in it. I just wanted to rest.

The Book of Lost Tales: Chapter 8 - Congratulations, You are Officially Insane!

After 60+ days of running, sweating and crawling on the floor riddling in pain, I finally finished my insane journey. I think everything went incredibly well. All the fat that was remaining in my gut pretty much vanished. Even my chest was starting to shape up nicely.

The stats from my journey are as follows:
Height: 5'10"
Starting weight: 158 lbs
Finish weight: 146 lbs
Weight difference: -12 lbs
Waist: 29.75 inches
Body fat % = 8.43%

Fit test exercises (I lost the numbers from the first fit test I performed in a washer):

In conclusion, Insanity is a great workout for shredding fat and toning up muscles. I think it would be difficult to gain muscle weight with the workout though. It's practically all cardio, and intense cardio at that. My guess is that eventually you would start burning muscle near the end of a workout. Light cardio with weight training would be a much better option for gaining muscle, in my opinion. Therefore, I probably won't attempt Insanity again as I would like to start gaining muscle for awhile. I'm happy with all the fat that I lost, and I averaged losing a little over a pound a week.

After pounding my body for 60 days, I decided it would be a good idea to take at least a two week rest period. I was ready to take it.

The Book of Lost Tales: Chapter 7 - Get Ripped!

"Anyone have some tape? Because I'm ripped!"

-Ben "Coco" Williams, Scott Francis's Math Class, 2006

The last month of Insanity makes you feel like you approaching death during every workout. Even the recovery workouts weren't a change of pace by any means. However, at the same time, it is rewarding to finish every workout and have no feelings of guilt of not bringing effort. It's a love / hate relationship. Someone once explained to me an analogy that summed it up pretty good. You feel horrible while you're working out, but you feel great afterward. The opposite is said for when you don't workout and eat unhealthy food and drinks. You feel good while you're eating all those sugary sweets and beverages, but then you feel bloated or guilty afterward. Just look up the meaning of the word hangover.

The exercises became much longer and therefore the duration of my pain was extended. At the same time, my body was gaining much more muscle and fat loss for all the extra pain that was getting signaled throughout my body. My goals of losing fat were happening rather quickly. I was shredding a handful of pounds every week.

While there were many changes going on physically with my body, there were also great changes mentally. My mood improved greatly it seemed. I had more energy than ever before and this time it wasn't from a energy drink or several large coffees. I also noticed that my taste buds were evolving. The first time I tried V8 vegetable juice, I almost gagged! By this point, I was downing V8 like I use to down soda and energy drinks. I actually looked forward to the taste. It's rather odd how this happened, but I guess I just got use to the taste. My favorite meal of the day though easily became my mid-morning and evening snacks. I included a protein bar or shake in both of those daily meals. Usually, I found myself eating a lot of Myoplex bars and shakes and Pure Protein bars. The Pure Protein bars probably have the best value of any bar. They are dirt cheap and have a decent amount of protein (20 g) in them. The taste of Myoplex is incredible in my opinion, however, they can be expensive. I still didn't have a full time job at this point, so I just stocked up on Pure Protein mostly. The Myoplex bars were like a treat I bought when I worked more hours at Lowe's.

Some noticeable physical changes to my body were that my shoulders were starting to develop nicely. Also, I felt a lot of strength build in my hamstring throughout the weeks. My abs started to develop around the recovery week, but near the end of the program is when they started to shape up nicely! I was just about done on my insane, little journey and I couldn't have been happier "getting ripped".

The Book of Lost Tales: Chapter 6 -The Take Over, the Breaks Over

After a week and a half or so, my body was fully healed from the horrible bug I caught. As a result, you better believe that I was ready to seriously punish my body. I got back into the swing of things with a fit test which kicked off my last month of Insanity. The Insanity Fit Test is a series of high intensity plyometric moves for about 25 minutes or so. Basically, the idea is to keep a log of all the moves every time this workout is performed and beat the number of reps on each move you did last time.

I absolutely crushed my numbers from the previous time. I think the main reason why that happened is because I felt so antsy to get back into working out the entire time I was sick. Strange as it sounds, it actually helped me get more explosive and mentally pumped. Believe me, whenever I started to warm up for workouts, it always use to feel like I had 5 pounds of sand in each of my shoes. It was getting pretty easy now it seemed though. I guess I built up some endurance. The energy drink kid was getting in shape! Who would've saw that coming?

My diet was advancing and I was getting a good blend of protein and carbs in my daily diet. Protein shakes were taken after every workout. They were pretty clutch as they got some pretty good nutrients in my body. My personal favorite protein shake is BSN's Syntha-6. It's pretty cheap if you order it on Amazon, the taste is pretty good for being whey protein, and two scoops will give you over 50 grams of protein. Some quality carbs I was eating daily included oatmeal in the morning, whole wheat pasta or whole grain brown rice for lunch in the afternoon, and the occasional whole wheat wrap or bread to go with some tuna at night. Tuna was by far my most used protein source during my Insanity diet. I stocked up on canned Tuna like I was preparing for a nuclear holucast. I'm being serious. No joke. At one point, I counted 24 mixed cans of tuna in my cupboard at home. Solid White Albacore, Chunk Light Tuna and Prime Filet Albacore were incorpated into my diet daily. Yes, I am aware that there is mercury found in fish, but I never set off any metal detector alarms with my body, so I'm not too concerned.

The first week of the second month of Insanity is pretty intense. The workouts get extended by about 20 minutes, and there are more training circuits to go through. This was a little tough to get use to at first, and my body did not like the first and second week of the second month. I loved it anyway though! After all, I was getting into the best shape of my life.

STFU N00B! (Volume 4)

Volume 4: Dear cocky Eagles fans

Dear cocky Eagles fans:
Before you brag about how "great" your team is and bust on every other team during the season please remember three things:
1. Don't do that.
2. You will choke at the end of the season, so be prepared to eat crow.
3. You have no superbowl trophies!!!

I feel that I must bring this to attention because all year the only things I heard from Eagles fans was straight out trash talk and meaningless words. Yes, I am a huge Washington Redskins fan and we did not have a great season by any means at all. But before you go ahead and trash me apart for liking a bad team, just remember the scoreboard before you open your mouth. We have three superbowl rings. You have zero. Not three, not two, not even one. You have 0!!! Therefore, I will fail to take any insult seriously coming from an Eagles fan until they finally win a superbowl ring and have more than the Redskins. Oh and by the way, Championship rings from the early 1900's DO NOT COUNT! Any team could have won one when there are only a handful of teams back then. Face facts and recognize that your team has failed to prove that they can play strong and win in the big game.

Also, why does everyone jump on the band-wagon when the Eagles are winning and nobody says anything when they are having a bad year? Is it because you only follow them when they win? Get real, people. I have been a Redskins fan since the year of 1994. They have been awful since then, but I still watch their games and root for them. If you like the Eagles, then that's great for you. I won't bust your ass for liking them. However, once you start running your mouths like you're the king of the county, and bust fans of other teams, expect to hear some words back. For instance, when the Steelers lost the superbowl this year, numerous Eagles fans on my facebook wall were blowing it up with "How about them Steelers?" and "So much for that stairway". It makes you really wonder what the thought process is here. You have zero rings! Zero! Doesn't it suck that you don't have the chance to play for your seventh ring, let alone first? Haters gonna hate, I guess.

Anyway, here's to a good next season. Whenever that may be! No hard feelings. :-)

Sincerely,
Fan of team with rings

The Book of Lost Tales: Chapter 5 - The Setback

I knew that entering week five of Insanity was going to be a bit rough, but I also felt that the timing of the injury was perfect because week five is a recovery week. The only problem was that at the end of week four, I felt pretty worn down. Also, to my dismay, I woke up on my rest day with a pretty wicked cold. I started thinking that I would only be doing light cardio throughout the entire week (which turned out not to be the case anyway), so I had visions of actually completing the week on time. However, it didn't turn out this way at all.

By the time Monday rolled around, I was sick as a dog. I had a sore throat, major headaches, blocked sinuses and a higher temperature than normal. There is no way that I would made any gains doing cardio comparable to walking that week. I knew that Insanity would be a stretch. For the first time, I did something safe and responsible. I figured that I would take a rest until I felt that I was 100% ready to get back into working out again.

I have to admit that I felt pretty useless during this week. Heavy doses of Nyquil were a regular daily requirement during the week. I must of used up at least four boxes of tissues during the time of my cold. I called off work for a couple of days and tried my best to get back into the flow of things physically and mentally. Most of my days being sick would go like this- I would wake up feeling extremely horrid and force feed myself breakfast and every other meal of the day so I didn't lose muscle and too much weight. Chicken Noodle soup was a pretty clutch meal during this sickness. It's a good idea to try and get healthy through nutrition when fighting a sickness. If I didn't eat much when I was sick, for example, I would of probably seen less muscle development.

In reality, this was probably a risky point in which I could of just quit Insanity. Many people quit by the recovery week. On the other hand, I knew that there was no way I was going to stop "being insane". I had goals and for once, I was having fun on the way to achieving them. I was mentally ready to come back and finish strong.

The Book of Lost Tales: Chapter 4 - Dealing with Injuries

During the 4th week of Insanity, I made some pretty big strides to achieving my goals at first. Something happened to my ankle during the third day of week four (Plyometric Cardio Circuit) that had me uneasy. Perhaps I was just getting worn down, or perhaps I was landing too hard on my feet during the jumping exercises. At this point, I took my routine into the laundry room. Normally, my laundry room is very cold. However, since it was mid-summer by the point, it was actually refreshing to be working out in that room. Originally, I was doing the exercises outside because it was so nice out. One thing that may have hindered me though was the concrete floor in the laundry room. Doing jumping jacks, power jumps, tuck jumps, basketball shots and mountain climbers were probably putting a good amount of pressure on my legs from landing on that concrete. Also, I was a bit of a n00b at this plyometric stuff, so my form probably wasn't the greatest.

By the fourth day of the fourth week of Insanity, my right ankle was pretty sore. I would get delivered an agonizing pain on the inside part of my right ankle whenever I landed on it when doing jumps. I tried many different things to counter this pain. For instance, I tried putting most of the pressure on my left leg when landing from jumps. This probably was not a great idea by any means, but I was so determined to finish this journey that I was stupid. By the fifth day of week four, I could really feel pain in my right ankle from performing simple tasks such as walking. However, I was such a meathead to get Insanity done on time, that I went to CVS and bought some tape for my ankle. In my ego's defense, the fifth week of Insanity is a recovery week, so I figured that my ankle would get a chance to heal then. Bad decision.

When I looked at the schedule and saw that Pure Cardio was on the list for that day, I cringed. I wrapped up my ankle with about three layers of tape and sucked it up. I pressed play on the video. At first, I felt like the tape took all of the pressure off my ankle. However, at the same time, it limited my mobility and agility to move lateraly. This was especially bad when doing lateral movements on moves such as the Heisman or Football Shuffles. I felt like Football Shuffles became Football Sticks. It was like a game of one legged hopscotch - very sloppy. Movement was all over the place and the form was just atricous. By the end of this workout, my ankle throbbed with pain. The pain was almost unbearable and I was close to being forced to stop several times. However, my ego told me to keep going.


When week four was all said and finished, it was determined that I had a Grade I ankle sprain. While this type of ankle sprain is minor at best, a grade II ankle sprain involves tearing of ligaments in the ankle. I think if I worked out a few more days after suffering the initial injury, I could of possibly tore a ligament.

To sum up the fourth week and the injury, I think I made a huge mistake trying to continue my workout. The only reason I say this is because I now realize that I probably wasn't making any gains that week. I was risking a lot on the line just to crank out two or three more days off the calendar. I was putting more pressure on my left leg and also putting risk for that leg to get injured. Also, my form was terrible for the entire week. How could I possibly get any gain out of that? I should of stopped and let my ankle heal, but my ego wanted no part of it. I probably would of stupidly kept on going and risked more injury if what happened over that weekend never occured next.

The Book of Lost Tales: Chapter 3 - Coming into a New Zone

Insanity is a two month journey that can ultimately lead one to their ultimate goal of cutting weight. Suddenly, I was just a week away from entering the recovery week. I still had a decent amount of fat on me that I wanted to shred and rip off of my body and never see again. I was on bad terms with fat. I had visions of molding the fat I had left in my abdominal region into pure muscle. However, I know it does not work this way. Your abs are covered by a layer of fat until you burn that layer off. In order for your abs to be visible, your body fat percentage needs to be roughly around 10% or less. Now, if it were only THAT easy. I went into Insanity with roughly 20% body fat. I was sluggish, slow and out of shape. I had a feeling that was changing though.

When the fourth week of Insanity came around, I noticed I wasn't gasping for air during the warm-ups. I felt... fine. I am confused at the thought of how I suddenly had more endurance. The last day of the third week seemed brutal, and I could easily recall how much I was discouraged that my stamina and endurance wasn't improving. Then, the day of rest came and it was like magic happened.

It was like a rare, exotic spider bit me overnight and I suddenly had acquired superpowers. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the warm-up to Pure Cardio (the most evil video of all time), was finished and I still had breath. To the best of my knowledge (it was always fuzzy doing Insanity), I never stopped. Of course, when the real exercise came in, my ass got kicked all over the place like a lost dog on the streets. The sequence of moves is still a blur to me now that I have finished the video numerous times. There are mountain climbers, high jumps, high knees, rapid lateral moves, shuffling and crazy things of all sort.

Needless to say, the video ended, and as I laid on the ground begging for air, a huge smile came across my face. I loved it. I wanted more. My brain was shouting "smother me in pain"! I cannot accurately and descriptively explain the euphoria I felt from this beating. While my body tingled with numbness, my brain felt it too. There were many things going through my mind. First, my mind was delivering messages of pain to my legs, core and the rest of my body. Believe me, a lot of these messages were sent that day. The smile on my face was definetly brought on by my brain telling me I was done for the day. Also, I knew my body's figure would be rewarded handsomely for my efforts. I got up from the ground and figured I would take care of my body's drastic need for glyocen and sugar with a nice beverage. After I finished my mountain dew... Alright, that was a joke. I grabbed a Myoplex protein shake and bathed in my feelings of success for the rest of the night. That night, no one could of brought me down to planet Earth. I was in a whole new zone and world. Everything seem to come together and make sense.

STFU N00B! (Volume 3)

Volume 3: Excuse me sir, could you not drive like a moron?

Bad drivers. Whether you're driving to work, going to the supermarket, we all hate them the same. They manage to get under our skin with their dumb driving skills. If you're like me, sometimes these drivers can leave us sitting in our seats swearing up a storm.

So let's define a "bad driver". Typically, a bad driver is also a moron / idiot / jackass. These qualities are essential to being a bad driver. However, I've found that these qualities alone won't make a bad driver. Behavior is what really defines a bad driver. To get started, let's take a look and examine the behavior of these terrible drivers on this youtube video I found. Some of these things people do with cars... I'll tell ya.



Let's get to business. Here are some of my biggest pet peeves from bad drivers:
1. Cruising in the passing lane - It's called "passing lane" for a reason. If it was designed for you to travel 10 miles per hour under the speed limit, then it would be called the "cruising lane". I couldn't tell you how many times I was driving on the highway and some fool was going around 50 mph in the left lane, clogging both lanes up. I like to cruise up right behind him, so they get fed up, speed up and pull over in the driving lane.
2. Turn signals - Are you going left? Are you going right? Are you going straight? Please let us know! It's not hard, people!!!
3. Tailgating - If I'm going 40-45 mph in a 35 mph speed limit zone, which is not slow by any means, there should be no reason to drive directly on my bumper. I know that some people drive unnecessarily slow. However, there should be no reason to tailgate someone who is going above the speed limit. My personal favorite comeback to getting tailgated is responding by slowing down 10 mph. Heh, you should see how funny the tailgater looks flailing his or her arms around in your rearviewmirror (and trust me, they will flail their arms and swear A LOT). I have yet to get my ass kicked from doing this yet, but I figure if they don't have the time to give me driving room, they won't have the time to follow me home and kick my ass. What's the worst they can do? Flip the bird? Child, please.
4. Not following yield signs - A yield sign does not translate to "you're okay to drive without checking traffic". It has been placed there for a reason.
5. Cutting people off - Here is a memo to all dumb drivers out there: I will no longer be stopping when you cut me off. If I hit your car, I'm just going to tell the cop that you cut me off and I could not stop in time. So you better be prepared to pay damage and repair for the maintenance of your vehicle, because I DON'T CARE. Cutting people off just to shave a few seconds of waiting in your car somewhere is a little crazy. Don't you think so?




Enough of the preaching though, here are some entertaining bad driver stories:

- I asked a truck driver I use to work with at my first job at Schiff's Food Supplies what the craziest thing he saw another driver do. He told me the wackiest thing he saw another driver do while driving was eat a bowl of cherrios in a suit and tie (probably late for work). The funny thing about this story is that he was eating a whole bowl of Cherrios, with milk, a spoon and everything. It wasn't one of those grab and go cereal bars. Well, at least he was lowering his cholesterol...
- Two trucks decided to race each other on the highway doing about 45 mph each. I guess they were trucks from the same company and thought it would be cute to race each other back and forth. My friend was driving to work and had enough of their games, so he passed them both off on the shoulder lane.
- I was actually in the backseat of the car that my friend Ben was driving for this next story. We were going a little over the speed limit and some bozo got directly behind our bumper. Well, this did not please Ben, so he dropped his speed to 10mph! The guy behind us was INCREDIBLY pissed. He was so disgusted that he actually followed us to our buddy's neighborhood. Ben knew a narrow alleyway in the neighborhood right next to our buddy's house that we could take. Now, we determined that if the guy went down this incredibly narrow and dangerous alleyway after us that he was hell-bent for some road rage. We pull in the alleyway and the guy turns in after us. What happened next was probably the smoothest and trickiest move I've ever seen anyone pull to get out of trouble. Ben floors it down the alleyway, turns on a street, drives a little bit up it, parks in between two cars on the street and turns the lights and car off. The guy eventually came out of the alleyway, but he was so confused that we were instantly gone that he kept driving and never found us.
- My brother use to always kid around while driving. He was that guy that would swerve the car back and forth to the side to get you concerned while he was driving. One day we're driving home from some event, and a kid riding a quad comes down in the opposite direction of where we were traveling. Now, this kid looks to be under the driving age and shouldn't even be on the road with his quad in the first place, but you know how that is. Anyway, my brother swerves the car suddenly to make it appear that we are going to steer right into the kid. However, he quickly pulls back to the right side, but the kid is simply terrified. We almost ran him off the road into a ditch. He looked back and shook his head in disgust while my brother drove away cynically laughing.
- A guy I currently work with said he pulled his car in the gas station early in the morning on his way to work. He started pumping gas and went inside for a cup of coffee. He pays for the cup of coffee, gets into his vehicle and drives away. The only problem with this is that he forgets to take the pump out of his car. Now that's pretty embarrassing.

That'll do it for this volume of STFU N00B! I leave you with this slideshow of horrendous drivers


Until next time,
Kurt